Every now and then I do a ‘welfare check’ on Climate Change and Energy Minister Chris Bowen, who fled X to the safe space of BlueSky.
It is here, in the relative digital calm, that he posts his ‘big ideas’ for the future of Australia. My personal favourite? The one where he’s holding up a surfboard made from wind turbines, implying this might be the solution to the mounting pile of trash discarded by the green energy industry. You can almost see the government-mandated ‘learn to surf’ programs threatening on the horizon to address the oversupply of surfboards.
The Minister must be getting lonely in his sanctuary of silence, because he posted a photograph inviting people to ‘ask him anything’ on Reddit.
And oh boy do I regret sharing his request with a wider audience.
It turns out that Australians have a lot of questions for the Minister, particularly on the eve of the Budget where the cost of energy is at the forefront of complaints.
Publishable examples include:
How much has been spent on renewables in Australia to date?
When did you first think Net Zero would make you popular?
There were plenty of quips about missing tools from the shed, sea level measurements (from people looking to ‘use their boat ramp to go fishing’), and perhaps the cruellest question of all: ‘What impact have you actually had on the climate?’
I try not to wade into Reddit, but I made an exception and found some impressively tricky technical questions addressed to the Minister.
Many of them relate to the utter shambles that Australia has made of its gas industry and, more particularly, why other countries are enjoying the benefit of cheap Australian LNG while state governments have painted it as an environmental demon that has to be exorcised from our homes.
Below is a selection of some questions the Minister chose to answer, including this bizarre one about the upcoming Federal Election.
One user asks what the Minister intends to do about Clive Palmer’s ads. Mr Palmer has recently launched the Trumpet of Patriots Party and intends to run candidates.
‘They’re a real pain,’ replies Mr Bowen, before indicating that electoral reforms will ‘make Clive Palmer’s attempts to influence the election a whole lot harder’.
The link in his reply takes you to an announcement from Senator Don Farrell which talks about increasing transparency and restricting funding from everyone except the unions…
Still on the topic of donations, another user asked about ‘big polluters’ and ‘lobbyists’ contributing money via other ways to which Mr Bowen replies that the question is a ‘fair one’. Read it for yourself (below) and see if you think it was answered properly.
Of course, Mr Bowen did not miss the opportunity to talk about the Labor Party’s favourite topic: misinformation and disinformation.
When one person went looking for answers about how to address conflicting views on climate science, the Minister replied, ‘The science of climate change is as certain that the science that tobacco causes cancer.’
If he had typed that on X instead of Reddit, he would have been hit with an immediate fact check.
He then calls the ‘misinformation’ on renewable energy ‘pernicious’ and brings up recycled wind turbines (but not the surfboards).
You may find it amusing that when the Minister was asked for some real-world detail on this apocalyptic threat underpinned by ‘certain’ climate science, he was not exactly forthcoming.
‘How many years do you think we have left before society collapses in Australia, given the certainty of rising sea levels which inundate our cities, unstable weather on agricultural land, and unintentional social instability due to resource contention?’
Who else are they going to ask, Greta Thunberg? She’s wrapped in a keffiyeh these days, screeching about different rivers and seas.
‘I choose to talk about things from a positive angle,’ replied Mr Bowen, avoiding the question entirely. It’s astonishing how quickly science gives way to ‘vibes’ when people ask for verifiable data.
The Labor Party may as well say, There’s definitely an imminent apocalypse that will kill everyone if you don’t let us tax you … but we’re not going to spoil the surprise and tell you when it’s coming.
Here are a few more of his non-answers:
Let’s hope that Mr Bowen’s Treasurer, Jim Chalmers, has done a better job approximating real-world costings…
As far as we can tell from reading these responses, there is no concept of a fail-point at which the process of energy transition becomes the existential crisis. Rather, this is policy via Godly command where a moral declaration is made and therefore it must be obeyed. In this respect, Mr Bowen is following the course of so many ancient mariners who sailed off toward ruinous seas, never to be seen again.
There are more replies from Mr Bowen, but after a while, he starts to sound uncannily like ChatGPT.
Instead, let us finish this bizarre adventure with a question about electric vehicles.
Remember, Australia followed the lead of America and Europe in pushing regulations, subsidies, and mandates into the car market to force a transition toward EVs regardless of whether people actually wanted to buy them.
This was driven (forgive me) by the narrative that EVs will save the planet.
Those same people who shilled for EVs are out across America right now, keying, smashing, and firebombing those same EVs because they disagree politically with Elon Musk.
One wonders how real their fear of the climate apocalypse is as they stand there, facing domestic terror charges, watching black smoke fill the sky.
So far, we are yet to hear one of our climate-keen politicians comment on this hypocrisy from the activist crowd.
Keeping this in mind, one person wanted to know how the whole EV thing was going.
In response, Chris Bowen started talking about all the changes his government made to allow people to use the batteries in their cars to power their homes.
Does the Minister know something about the energy grid that we don’t?
Hopefully you enjoyed this little glimpse into Mr Bowen’s mind.
These are the questions he should be forced to come onto hostile news programs to answer.
Until then, we’ll keep checking in on his tiny corner of the internet.
Flat White is written by Alexandra Marshall. If you would like to support her work, shout her a coffee over at donor-box.
